Buying a house will put stress on your relationship. It’s inevitable. Because going through the process is inherently stressful.
How could it not be? You’re making a huge financial and life decision that is going to be with you for years to come. You’re being asked to sign legal documents left and right. You’re hiring inspectors and maybe dealing with repairs. And of course, you’re preparing for the big move.
The current market, with low inventory and lots of people getting into bidding wars, certainly isn’t helping this problem. It’s a process that can be overwhelming, nerve-wracking, and confusing.
So of course buying a house puts extra stress on your relationship.
But you and your partner don’t have to take this lying down. Here are a few tips I offer my clients in Houston marriage counseling to alleviate home-buying relationship stress.
Take time out to relax
Dealing with a home purchase can make your to-do list overloaded, but it’s crucial to take time away to decompress. Spend a night in front of the TV, make a nice dinner, or go out for a night on the town. Give yourself a break from the decision-making and relationship problems to enjoy one another’s company.
Ask for help
For some, getting away from the to-do list only makes them more stressed. After all, those items aren’t going away on their own!
But don’t use that as an excuse to put relaxation on the back burner. Instead, get help. Lean on friends and family members. Ask for assistance packing up boxes, and with child care, food preparation, and household chores.
When it’s all over with, thank them by inviting them to your new place for a house-warming party. And definitely repay the favor when they go through a stressful time in the future.
Remember to be excited
With all the nail-biting, it can be easy to forget why you wanted to make the move in the first place. Maybe you’re getting a bigger place, relocating to a nicer area, or taking a new job.
Even if the reason you’re moving isn’t one you choose, making a change can be an exciting time. It all depends on your outlook.
So buying a house causes stress on your relationship. You know what reduces it? Exercising and eating right!
This is one of those to-do items you don’t want to ignore. Maintaining good nutrition and regular exercising can help make it easier to cope with stress and relationship problems.
Just like you should make time for the health of your relationship, make time for your personal health and encourage your partner to do the same.
Talk out worries
You’re worried about the cost? Sad about losing your dream home? Think you’re biting off more than you can chew? Guess what? Your partner probably has many of the same worries — along with different ones of their own.
The best way to alleviate some of that worrying is to talk to each other. Get it out there. Accept your partner’s support and offer yours in turn.
Having trouble discussing these things without starting an argument? It can help to have a professional work with you. Reach out today to discuss your relationship problems.
Originally published 9/16/2011. Updated 3/2/2021.